Kind: captions
Language: en
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AC
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alhamdulillah a lot of us men fail to
express their feelings to their
wives and they fail to send them a text
message saying I love you I miss you
they failed to buy them a gift sometimes
in my counseling sessions I see a wife
of 20 years complaining that her husband
only brought her four gifts in their
marriage only four gifts so so women are
different than men they depend entirely
and they live and they thrive on their
emotions and feelings if men are
negligent ignorant not expressing any of
such attention to their feelings their
marriage is at the brink and there won't
be a lot of
what Allah described in the Quran among
his signs that he created from uh uh for
you from yourselves spouses so that you
would find an abode in them and he made
between you care Mercy affection
compassion so if you fail to pay
attention to your wife's
emotions you have a big problem
the prophet wasam a role
model
was the
master in noticing such emotions and
feelings once he said to Mother Aisha I
know when you're pleased and when you're
angry so mother AA looked at him and
said how would you know that so the
prophet saidat wasam if you
are pleased when you talk you swear by
and say no by the Lord of Muhammad you
swear by Allah being the Lord of
Muhammad but if you're angry you would
say no by the Lord of
ibraim so the prophet would notice that
he's not swearing by the Lord of
Muhammad she's swearing by the Lord of
ibraim which means she's angry of him
she said yes by oh prophet of Allah I
only abandon your
name when I'm angry I would not do
anything except not using your name when
I make such an oath the prophet
Alam was not such a person who would not
care whether his wife is pleased or
not also anas reports that that the
prophet Alat wasam would console his
wife when she is in pain or she has a
crisis or a
Calamity once the prophet sallallahu
alaih wasallam saw safia crying and he
said why are you
crying and she said because my co-wife
your other wife
haa said that I am the daughter of a
Jew yes her father was a
Jew and she was married to a Jew and
herself was a Jew but now she's a Muslim
and she's the wife of the Prophet Alam
so such a word
hurts and she was crying because of
that and in another
incident she also cried and the prophet
saw her crying so he wiped her tears
with his hand showing her affection and
emotion so when he heard what haa said
to her he consoled her and said to her
listen when she says this to you tell
her that I'm the daughter of a prophet
meaning Moses and my uncle is a prophet
meaning
harun and my husband is a prophet
meaning
Muhammad so he made her cheerful and
happy by saying this then he went to H
and said to her fear Allah and never
repeat that
again so he
looks at his wife and tries to be with
her
and to show her affection and that he's
sharing her pain with her mother AA when
she went with the prophet in the state
of in ha and she got her period she
started to cry the prophet noticed this
any one of us would have turned his back
and walked away not the prophet he went
said what's wrong why are you
crying did you get your period and she
said yes explaining to him that now she
cannot complete her Haj with
him that's what she thought so the
prophet explained to her that there is
no problem in that you do whatever the
pilgrims do except you don't go around
the uh Kaa in ta and when you're
purified you can do your rosul and then
complete your rituals this is something
that Allah prescribed upon women
Daughters of Adam there's no no problem
in that so he comforted
her even when his wives would fall sick
he would not
complain he would not say who would do
the cooking and the cleaning and who
would serve me rather he would show
them
compassion and whenever one of them got
sick he used to go there wipe with his
right hand say the
Dua to the end so he goes and checks
where the pain is and shows her
the compassion and that he's feeling her
pain and even if she's not cured by that
at least she has the feeling that he is
there with her and next to
her the prophet
never blamed his wives that none of you
gave birth to a child for
me and he could have done that he
married Khadijah and he had six of of
her and none of you nine women could do
that to me he could have kept on blaming
them but he would never do such a thing
because he knew that this was the decree
of Allah and his wives had nothing to do
with it and the prophet sallallahu alhi
wasallam as a man was an easy going
person as jabber
explains he says the prophet was an easy
going person if Mother
AA was inclined for something as long as
it's Halal he would help her do that as
in the case
where when the
abian uh slaves and soldiers came to you
know march with their Spears and and and
and exercise in the Masjid the prophet
sallam asked her do you want you would
like to watch them play and she said yes
so he sat down and made her put her head
on his shoulder so that it she was
covered by his body and she would look
until she was satisfied this is how the
prophet Salli wasallam used to deal with
his wives not like most or some of us
may be so harsh so uh uh uh rude some of
the men you find them wanting just to
prove their manhood by refusing and
rejecting and objecting to anything that
the wife wants want so if she wants to
stand up no no no sit down sit down if
she wants to stand to sit no no stand up
what is this it's just want to control
it's the feeling of Simon Says and
wanting to control and this is not
something that is uh a
positive and the prophet s wasallam
would encourage his wives to do good
deeds
as in the case of the last 10 nights of
Ramadan where he used to wake his wives
and encourage them to pray and likewise
every single night he would remind his
wives to go and offer Witter and he
would
sayat if uh um may Allah have mercy over
a man who wakes up in the midle middle
of the night and to pray and he would
wake up his wife and if she refuses to
wake up he would sprinkle water in her
face and may Allah have mercy on a woman
who wakes up to pray night prayer and
she offers her prayers and she wakes up
her husband and if he refuses she
sprinkles water in his face so this is
how the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wasallam used to
do with his wives because he wanted them
to be in the highest levels of J he used
to encourage his wives to give in
charity as in per the Hadith of OHA take
a visor and a protection from Hellfire
even by giving away half a
date and whenever the prophet Alat his
family used to slaughter a sheep he
would ask ask what is left of
it and AA would say oh oh prophet of
Allah nothing is left except the
shoulder meaning that we gave everything
of this sheep and kept the shoulder for
us to eat the prophet corrected her by
saying
no
everything
remains and the shoulder is what was
gone meaning the shoulder when we
consume it this is gone wasted but what
we've given in charity is the thing that
remains and the thing that
would benefit us on the day of
judgment and the prophet
Alat though he was so kind and
compassionate and
affectionate though he was
caring that did not stop him
from forbidding evil and vice and any
form of transgression whenever it occurs
from his
wives so there is this
balance and we should learn this balance
there is a red line we should not cross
mother AA
says the prophet sallai wasallam came
once from an
expedition where I had while he was
absent covered a small
hatch or a room with a curtain that had
pictures on it when the prophet came
inat he stood by the gate the door and
did not enter and another narration he
went in took the curtain down and tore
it
up so when she saw the prophet not
coming in she said oh prophet of Allah I
seek Allah's forgiveness and I Repent to
him what have I done he said said oh
don't you know that those who made these
pictures are the most severely punished
on the day of
judgment and this shows us the gravity
of
such a sin to
have things of or containing pictures of
humans or animals in your home so the
prophets love to AA did not stop him
from forbidding evil Also whena may
Allah be pleased with her cursed the
Jews who used to come in and
say meaning death be upon you and the
prophet would hear them and would ignore
what they said by replying to them by
saying that's it it doesn't complete the
whole
phrase because they did not sayam they
said
Sam so she cursed them and she said that
you may death be upon you you
grandchildren of apes and and pigs and
the likes and they said
no don't do
this a Believer is not someone who
Slanders or says offensive words Allah
responds to me when I say meaning death
but he does not respond to them when
they say their uh uh offensive words
against me
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