Kind: captions
Language: en
hey everybody welcome to another episode
of after impact I'm your host Tom Bilu
and I am here with agent Smith Mr Bilu
what's up man how doing how we doing
great ready to get into this episode yes
this one was a lot of fun Gary was
amazing super glad that we had him on
the show yeah um and really feel like
this interview was a little different
than most of his interviews which is was
the goal yeah it was nice and it really
felt like it was a special moment I
think for us here at impact Theory just
because um we've been watching Gary's
content for a long time we are very much
aligned with his philosophy on marketing
and providing value so um and we work
with Vayner Talent so it was uh it was
nice to finally see this come to
fruition it's been in the works for a
long time so thanks everyone for being
patient yeah thanks for being patient
and thanks to vayer for helping make
this actually happen those guys are
amazing we love working with them very
very much and uh pinning Gary down is
not easy so getting him to finally like
schedule it uh was it took an inhuman
effort and mad love to our own Dr
finesse by the way for staying on that
consistent like a blood hound finally
making it happen yes and we've got Lisa
B you creeping in the background so not
never sure what to make of that all
right so share if this content's adding
value is that where we're welcome
everyone to Facebook live if you're
joining us this is impact this is a show
where Tom and I go deep into the episode
of impact Theory which this week is Gary
vaynerchuk the man the myth the legend
right there uh the episode is called why
perspective will make or break you um
this was a fantastic episode if you
don't know who Gary vaynerchuk is I
don't understand how that's possible but
if it is possible I'll give you a quick
rundown of who he is he's the CEO Vayner
media which is one of the top digital
marketing and creative agencies in the
world serving some of the biggest
consumer Brands including Toyota Pepsi
and GE just to name a few he's a well
recognized thought leader and influencer
and one of the pioneers of personal
branding um he has a social media reach
of 3.5 million plus I think right yeah
he's an angel investor he's been
investing in some of the biggest tech
companies in the last decade or so um
he's a speaker he's the creator of the
Wine Library which was a big YouTube
sensation way back in the day he's also
the author of four New York Times
bestselling books that's four and on
business and marketing and to top it all
off he's just a really good person yeah
which really came to light in this
episode yeah definitely um so why don't
we kick it off there what why do you
like first of all how did you get him
into that zone because that's what a lot
of people are commenting on in YouTube
like I've never seen the side of Gary um
he just seems really genuine and
authentic he really cares about people
was that something that you were
planning out as you were researching him
very very much so um and to be fair like
that's what I'm trying to do with
everybody so I have a strategy which
I've laid out for people before and it
goes something like this so um I'm first
of all I'm only trying to bring on
people that have already inspired me so
there something about them that I'm very
moved by and I'm trying to capture that
in the intro so to write the intro I try
to find their Loop and their Loop is
like that thing that they say all the
time so in every interview and I'm as
guilty of this as anybody you've got
like your sweet spot right and you
gravitate towards that it's a thing that
you've said enough times that like you
have the words they're there for you
they're ready you're going to sound
super eloquent uh like wow like this is
a well thought out thing because you've
just done it so many times right and if
you watch his Keynotes you'll see that
like you migrate that over time I mean
he you know was a great example and and
I try to do the same thing where it's
like you want your own fresh thoughts
and you want to you've encountered new
ideas and new people that have sparked
something and so it it drifts over time
but nonetheless at any one time anybody
who's used to giving interviews is going
to have a loop so I'm going in I'm
trying to find that Loop that helps me
understand them it helps me understand
what's important to them and I think
that's a thing that um a lot of
interviewers Miss is the the person like
there are certain parts of their story
that they tell over and over and over
now the reason that they're telling
those parts of the story is because that
matters to them that's a part of their
identity so when you find that Loop to
understand that these are the things
that are meaningful to that person and I
try to honor them by putting that in the
intro I try to give context to the
viewers by putting that in the intro and
quite frankly I'm trying to take it all
away from them and by that I mean like
no one once I've said it in the intro
like they would just sound like they're
repeating themselves ironically if they
then reference back to something that I
said in the intro so it it sets all that
aside and it and it then moves us
forward so it's like okay here's your
Loop I've encompassed it all so that you
feel good that it's out there and then
now I'm going to try to ask you
questions that take you beyond that that
come from my real fascination with who
you are and what I've learned to do is
trust my gut so if some really obscure
like when I was watching the episode
with him and his father and he cried and
like they made no reference to it his
dad doesn't his dad sees that he's
crying he's crying doesn't say just W
like literally wipes it away and then no
reference so I was like wait a second
like we got to talk about that we got to
talk about like I was so moved and so I
literally the chills right now thinking
about it like in that moment I felt like
holy [ __ ] like he's not just telling the
story that he knows is good like there's
really really something between him and
his dad there's really really something
about those formative years and he talks
so much about like being an immigrant
and having come and like being bullied
and all of that
stuff but that little moment gave me an
insight into this is really him like
this guy that really wants people to get
along and connect it's because he
actually connects to people he like cuz
the reference that made him cry was his
dad saying I miss the hourlong commute
that we had every day to the store that
was it I missed the hourlong commute
that we had and and that like hit Gary
so hard that he got emotional and I
thought okay this is all real and that
was a real click moment for me so it's
things like that like trusting that like
because I'm so moved by this other
people are going to be moved by this and
that's how you take an interview
somewhere totally unique that only you
could do because you have like I had a
moment with them in that episode that
maybe like everybody else has seen but
it didn't resonate or for whatever
reason but it resonated with me and so
that was like you just accumulate those
things that you want to talk about based
on that and then if you can get a big
enough world view of who this person is
and and I'm a huge believer in Gary and
his vision of marketing that's why we're
a client like I really really think he
gets something that not a lot of people
get and so because I'm so familiar with
his content I'm so familiar with his
world and I try to be
that familiar with everybody that we
bring on I can go wherever they go right
so if he like something resonates with
him and he starts going down an Avenue
over here like I'm studied there right
so then we can talk about it awesome uh
we got a lot of viewers showing up 119
live viewers thank you everyone boom
that's our that's a high water mark
thanks everybody um so again Welcome to
our Facebook live discussion of the
impact Theory episode with Gary
vaynerchuk um if you find this content
valuable please share it and why don't
we we should give away his book his most
recent asgary V book so if you share
this content um yeah send us a screen
grab in the connect impact Theory inbox
that's Co n
nect and we will enter you to win a copy
of the Gary V book Ask V love it cool uh
I want to read a couple of comments here
just before we really dive in because we
had a lot of comments on YouTube this
one is from ol Rick Evanson he says I
had no idea I literally thought Gary was
a more negative person watching a few
Clips with him this is so empowering he
is describing something I live and
strive for achieving greatness while
being a good person something a lot of
people a lot try to convince you is
impossible so thank you love that yeah I
was surprised by how many people had
something like that to say like oh I
didn't really like him I thought he was
negative um and Gary talked about that
in the episode he said when somebody
pulls like one random clip which by the
way for anybody watching
um I have a rule I don't do journalist
interviews and what I mean by that is if
somebody's writing a story where they're
going to come in assimilate my worldview
pull one or two quotes and then package
up an article from their point of view I
don't do that and the reason much to
your dismay and the reason that I don't
do that is because I feel that they so
grossly
misrepresent that I only like and I for
when I saw people saying that they
thought Gary was negative I was like
what the [ __ ] like Gary's one of the
most optimistic positive people I've
ever encountered literally in my entire
life yeah so the fact that he can be
abstracted with these bites and sound
negative uh like that is utterly
terrifying to me and that's why long
form is the only thing that I do I don't
like to be edited much like I get it
you're going to have to tighten it up
but like don't take me out of context
don't jumble my sentences like you've
you got to let it play because the
Nuance in in any worldview is everything
and once you lose that H it's terrifying
yeah and thank God like I literally
would have had no interest in being
forward- facing 10 years ago before you
could do it your way because if I had to
be at the mercy of the media it's it's
nasty dude and I won't even say that
they do it on purpose but it's gross the
way that it comes out in my opinion all
right let's take things in a little bit
of a different direction so um you
speaking of Gary's optimism uh he says
in the episode we're grossly
underestimating the internet
itself and thinks things are going to
scale to be so much bigger so much just
so much different than when we're
looking at it today so how how much do
you think we're underestimating the
inter internet and where do you see
things going and we'll say with regards
to personal branding social media yeah
perfect um so I think that we are
grossly
grossly underestimating what the
internet is capable of and when you
think about the paradigm shift that's
happening in media so um everyone knows
my whole thing in fact for the people
recently I guess because we brought it
up in the episode I've been getting
asked again a lot like what's this whole
thing with wanting to be a bigger Studio
than Disney and I don't think people yet
really understand what I'm talking about
so Disney is the scale that I'm talking
about it is I'm not trying to be like
Disney in the like we're not going to
make cartoon well actually we may make
cartoons and I've got this whole thing
about impact Theory kids and we'll we'll
talk more about that but that isn't what
I mean I don't mean similar in content
type what I'm talking about Disney looks
at the world of culturally relevant
intellectual property and they buy it
but it's the culturally relevant
intellectual property okay that's what
I'm talking about now we're living in a
time right now where everybody and Gary
talked about this in the episode The in
infrastructure costs of NBC ABC CBS um
Disney all of them they're so
extravagant so extravagant and to do a
tent pole film in this day and age is
hundreds of millions of dollars okay not
I it's like $200 million for off film
like I don't care how big you are you
can only absorb so many misses yeah so
it is a really dangerous game I think
there's a fundamentally different way to
play it that is only possible now
because of the internet is only possible
now because anybody for relatively cheap
can put out a real show can put out
their own thing can get people's
attention can get people to really
understand connect authenticity and
transparency that's like the king maker
okay so we're living in a time right now
where the internet where social excuse
me social media especially is giving us
the US like the real human beings behind
a company giving us the ability to be
authentic and transparent now that that
is a fundamental building block to The
Human Condition we love authenticity and
transparency it makes us feel connected
we feel like we know the person when you
know them you feel like you can trust
them you know what they stand for they
resonate something back at you which is
really what people care about how I make
them feel about themselves right so just
watch the comments like Tom thank you so
much like you've inspired me to be me to
become the person I want to become to go
out and create the things I want to
create it's about them okay but being
authentic being transparent gives people
the ability to connect with a real human
being behind a company that's never
existed before ever literally in human
history it's never existed you've never
had a corporation where people could
connect actually connect dude like it
was the world's smallest group of people
maybe employees but even then like it's
just next to Impossible without the
power of the internet social media for
people to do that so I can come on here
and three times a week for a [ __ ]
hour I sit here and I'm like this is who
I am right so God like maybe there are
people talented enough to totally
[ __ ] I just don't think so people
reveal themselves when they talk they
cannot help and not only do I come on
here and do it for three hours a week
I'm going and I'm being interviewed by
other people all week long so the sheer
number of hours worth of content that I
put out every week there's only so many
places to hide so it's giving people
this chance for authenticity and
transparency okay those are the king
makers I want to make that really
[ __ ] clear so now you've got a world
built around that people can see who I
really am that I can create something in
this is what Disney did and this is
another reason I use this as a reference
Disney was one of the most famous people
on the planet if not the most famous
person on the planet in like the 40s and
50s okay think about that for a second
the head of a studio that doesn't happen
anymore so but he was doing it in an era
where it was a carefully crafted Persona
which seemed to be largely real like
that really seemed to be him like there
was like a folksiness to him and all
that like that he really pined for he
wanted wanted that like he loved that
and that's why it just poured out of him
now was he a complicated individual
almost certainly true and like look all
of us are flawed again something Gary
talks about very eloquently in the
episode it's like I'm not saying that
Disney was perfect I'm certainly not
saying I'm perfect but it's like you put
yourself out there in a way where people
have someone something that they can
identify that becomes the ethos of the
brand okay now ethos of a brand is
critical and typically people have got
that out through traditional marketing
so if I'm Nike I'm not necessarily sure
showing you Phil Knight what I'm showing
you are athletes and people Jordan right
so Jordan became the ethos of Nike
represented excellence and all of that
and they've done an amazing job of
leveraging that to create the ethos of
the brand but we're now living in a time
where I don't need anything in between
me and the end um user of our products
of our social content all of that I
literally just be myself right I be
myself and now people can see the ethos
of the brand which historically was just
incred incredibly difficult to do so
when you think about those things as
fundamental building blocks of the human
condition that is why this time is so
unbelievably powerful where you get to
be yourself and people get to see that
connect with it and decide whether your
brand your thing is what they want to be
a part of and you don't have to throw a
lot of capital at it like don't be like
we've thrown more Capital at it than
most people CU look I
spent almost two decades like in the
world of just GR finding it out and
building a business silently behind the
scenes never stepping forward like not
that that wasn't a part of it cuz it
didn't
exist but even if you don't have access
to those resources there are many people
going from nothing look at LS how going
from his sister's couch to building a
massive following by not by throwing
money at it but just by being consistent
putting out value ad content like really
doing something delivering value right
and at the end of the day that's what
it's all about so I I literally could
keep going and I feel like I have given
you just the absolute tip of the iceberg
of why this is so potent and Powerful
but the reality is that an average kid
from pipsy can now become NBC by putting
out awesome content because distribution
is
free there you have it there you have it
all right I love it um let's talk about
that kid from pipy yes please uh one of
the big points in Gary's episode is that
um complaining is sort of the the
Surefire way to tell if somebody has
what he calls losing pessimistic DNA
versus um winning optimistic DNA when
you're not
complaining so how do you change
someone's perspective who is living
let's say in a underserved Community
either rural or Urban um they have very
little around them is set agent Smith
well I just want to I want you to
elaborate on this especially for people
who are maybe joining us for the first
time um
what they have very little resources and
very little hope so how do you start
changing their
perspective all right so the reason I
say that this is a setup is this this is
the question that I was trying to answer
with this company so impact theory is
meant to answer that question so um I
work I've worked in the inner cities a
lot so I used to big brother I mean
these are sort of my famous stories um
used to Big Brother for a kid named ran
and ran if you're watching definitely
ping me um
and that I was too young to really
understand what was happening I just
knew that like things were not working
out well for him because of where he was
growing up and I like I felt it was my
mission in life to take him to literally
Beverly Hills so I used to bring him to
Beverly Hills all the time now this is
back when I'm dirt poor but like I would
use that as leverage in my own mind
drive around look at the big houses
fantasize like what do I need to do to
make that come true in my life and and
they like wealthy neighborhoods are
typically beautiful neighborhoods and
that's what I wanted him to see I wanted
him to see like Beauty I wanted him to
see green grass right and like in the
inner cities like it just doesn't exist
and so trying to take him somewhere nice
so my logic was a movie ticket costs the
same no matter where you see the movie
so you might as well go to a nice
neighborhood to see the movie so I would
take him to like the man's Chinese
Theater uh Century City like just trying
to get him into nice beautiful places um
and
and then later when I go uh and we found
Quest and I'm again I find myself in the
inner cities but now I'm hiring people
like on mass and I'm interviewing
literally I've interviewed like 1500
people at this point and just the
overwhelming majority of them grew up
hard poor and asking them questions
trying to get to know who they are I
start to see like this worldview that
just doesn't make sense and meaning it's
Ultra limited they believe there's only
certain certain things that they they
can do that they're capable of they
don't believe like they literally don't
believe they can do anything they set
their mind to without limitation they
don't believe that through hard work and
discipline anything like can become real
they don't believe that um just because
they started here doesn't mean they have
to end up there and it's not about who
you are it's about who you want to
become the price you're willing to pay
to get there like all the things that
make my world view like they don't
believe in it they don't believe in it
because they've never encountered it and
all people have ever told them there's a
I need to [ __ ] memorize this this
lyric because I find myself coming back
to it all the time I don't even remember
what song it's from but this guy goes
they don't want to see you
win and he was referencing like Society
at large right they don't want to see
you win talking to people of color in
the inner cities they don't want to see
you win and I thought that is depressing
like if that's your world view that they
don't want to see you win that your
world is like the world is against you
and you're going to have to stay here
and I am here to tell you right now it's
always about the other person the moment
moment you can make them feel better
about themselves they don't care where
you come from like your focus needs to
be how do I Empower that person like if
you want to get out of the um out of a
bad situation whatever your situation go
to somebody who's living your ideal life
and say I'm going to work harder and
smarter than anyone's ever worked for
you I'm going to do it for free and if
you go and do that and exchange for
relationships and information then if
you deliver a crushing overwhelming
amount of value that person literally
does not care where you come from like
money oh God I forget who said this but
it was like money isn't um patriotic
right money isn't patriotic money
doesn't see color dude I'm telling you
if you can make somebody money and you
can say that this is bad fine I don't
care it's just true if you can make
somebody money if you can Empower them
if you can Empower their business if you
can make them feel better about
themselves whatever like they're going
to want to be around you that is a
fundamental fact about being a human
being like people want to be around
people that Empower them that en Rich
them like true so you have to get
yourself to the point where you can be
valuable to people like that so here I
am I'm in the inner cities I'm trying to
hire these people that have this limited
worldview that doesn't take into account
reality and I'm just like what is
happening so I start asking myself
fundamental question in a one-on-one
situation if I can make myself valuable
enough in their life then I could one at
a time get them to see a better
worldview I could shape their mindset
but I would have to get them away from
the other people that are poisoning
their mindset like I will give you an
example and hopefully one day he will
let me tell this story with his name
attached to it one of the people that we
hired during this time who is an
incredible human being um he actually
got into a fist fight because he started
reading and he wanted other people in
his neighborhood to like join a book
club with him and to do this and they
were like you've changed but not like
you've changed like and that kind of
sucks like you've changed and I want to
[ __ ] can fight about it and I was
like how that is so weird like that is
such a bizarre I recognize it it's true
humans are like that and when you make
them feel insecure about themselves like
they have to do something to rectify the
situation so he literally got in a fist
fight with somebody because he was
reading and I was like that that's
[ __ ] crazy so anyway you have to get
them away from the people that are toxic
and all that so as I'm thinking through
this problem I'm like okay what do I
know about humans what is the
fundamental truth about the way that we
assimilate truly disruptive information
because that's what I'm trying to do I'm
trying to get them to take in a totally
different worldview and the answer is
narrative right we could have already
gone very long on this answer I am
wildly passionate about it so passionate
I'm giving my entire life and a massive
part of my um wealth to it so it's like
truly truly I believe in this
um narrative is the way that we
assimilate disruptive information so I
know that it's going to have to be
narrative what are the five forms of
narrative you've got books comic books
TV shows movies and videos games those
are the dominant forms arvr maybe is
going to come and almost certainly but
it's not here yet um but those are the
five forms so I know I'm going to be
dealing in that realm because I don't
want to change Behavior I want to
leverage it so I know that people
already seek out that entertainment
factor and they seek it out because it
takes us on an emotional roller coaster
Lisa and I were talking about this
yesterday during relationship Theory
there is something about intense emotion
good or bad doesn't matter it's why
people [ __ ] watch horror films
literally the point of a horror film is
to scare you it shouldn't make sense
right but it does and we all get it all
know why people do it so intense
emotions are awesome people love it
whether they're high or low that's a
[ __ ] weird part about Humanity we'll
go into in another episode but like
people love intense emotions that's why
one of the reasons why narrative has
lasted because it takes you on that
emotional roller coaster so I know
people are already going to do that so
I'm going to inep them there so that I
don't have to do it one-on-one that I
can create Mass pop culture properties
that really paint an empowering
worldview through characters that you
love relate to connect with take you on
the emotional roller coaster all of it
but all the while really subtly in the
background I'm just dripping on you that
you can do anything you set your mind to
that you can overcome any obstacle that
it doesn't matter where you start it
only matters who you want to become the
price you're willing to pay to get there
that you've got to change the five
people that you're hanging out with in
order to like you know move on and so
you're going to see characters in the
impact Theory Universe do that over and
over and over it's called the hero with
a thousand faces written by Joseph
Campbell you can tell the same story
from a thousand different angles and by
doing that I really believe the way that
Disney and this again why the things
that resonate for me with Disney Disney
understood that about the the magic of
childhood that like simpler time that
probably never actually existed but we
all sort of feel because we were simpler
and the world seemed easier and smaller
and um easier to digest and understand
and connect with and you have an not an
inflamed but uh your amydala is just out
of control when you're a kid so emotions
are like really height and that's why
when the friends you have when you're 12
like it just seems like I'll never have
a friend like this again and you really
won't because your amydala gets in line
and your prefrontal cortex develops and
hey how much weirder could I make this
answer but this is all [ __ ] true like
this is all what's going on in my head
about why impact theory has to be a
media company why we're going to tell
certain kinds of stories all about that
empowerment I'll stop myself there I
could literally go on forever this is
the most important question in my life
if anybody has questions to that
response or has a follow-up comment put
it in the comments now
so we can get into it uh here's a
comment from our Facebook live
Community Daniel Breeze uh Gary said the
closer people are to the Sun the harder
they work he was referencing himself
people being around him in the office do
you think it's because they work harder
when they're being watched or because he
is able to influence their work ethic
how would you influence someone's work
ethic it's very different person by
person this is where I have to say I'm a
filtering mechanism as is Gary um you're
not trying to change somebody but the
truth is like when you're around
somebody that's crushing it and you
admire them and they inspire you and
they make you feel like a better version
of yourself and you feel more alive when
you're around them and their energy is
contagious all things that are true
about humans negative energy is
contagious positive energy is contagious
and I found that exact same thing when
people work around me they are different
human beings than when they're even one
layer removed so working for me is very
different than working for someone who
works for me and that I am trying to
crack that trying to figure out how to
overcome that because that was
heartbreaking to watch it Quest anyway
that's a whole another answer so yes
100% is nothing about being watched it
is though about the social pressure cuz
he'll have a whole group of people
around him maybe there's like 10 to 20
people that are sort of his inner circle
Inner Circle and when you get into that
everybody's working their ass off
everybody's holding themselves to a
certain standard everybody's striving
for the same kind of thing they're all
ignited by the same stuff and so when
you get into that it's like that moment
in um uh Finding Nemo where they get
into the current I forget the the name
of the that main current in the ocean
and when you're outside of it you just
see people going by and then literally
you move like 8 inches up and it catches
you and it takes you off that's what
it's like to be in an environment like
that where you get swept up in that
momentum cool all right I want to remind
everyone who's just joining us we're on
Facebook live this is after impact the
show where Tom and I go deep into the
episode of impact Theory discussing Gary
Vayner Chuck today which if you haven't
seen you need to check out this one was
it's by far one of our our strongest
episodes and uh a different side of Gary
that's what everyone's been commenting
on um which we love so you can win a
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sharing we'll give away a couple cple
books maybe we'll give away two or three
so look at you yeah nice I like it a
little generous today yeah we got to be
generous and we've got a lot of people
showing up so we want to show you thanks
for participating we we appreciate your
time and attention always uh here's a
question from oh by the way the song is
tunnel vision by Kodak Black is it
really will somebody write that down we
write that down thank you thank you
whoever said that uh Eternal gratitude
yes thank you shout out to uh the person
who looked it up on rap genius or
something or however you found it did we
not have their name what's their name
yeah what is their name Chase slack
their name is slack it was Michael
Foster Michael Foster thank you man dude
always contributing to this community
thank you brother thank you so much your
comments are never lost on me much much
much obliged and in fact he has a
question for you Gary believes people
are born with certain talents do you buy
into that or do you lean more toward the
fact that anything is able to be
cultivated with massive action and the
right mindset Gary and I are
diametrically oppos on this and um I
love that I look Gary thinks very deeply
about his stuff and so the fact that I
actually see us as sort of opposite ends
of the spectrum on a lot of things I I'm
just wildly respectful of his opinion
but I really believe that humans are
capable of change now to Gary's point
about there are certain things that
you're going to what I'll call get early
wins so you um like for me speaking was
an early win but compared to what I'm
capable of now verbally to where I was
when I was a kid it's like night and
[ __ ] day so there are many being an
entrepreneur though for me everything
was painful every lesson was hard like
none of it comes naturally Gary was
selling people their own flowers as a
kid which I think Wes Chapman did as
well like I I don't get it like I'm not
wired like that that never would have
cross my mind like so I had to learn to
be an entrepreneur but I feel like I've
learned it like and look it's an ongoing
thing and I'll be better 10 years from
now than I am today but like that was
was me going whoo I am not a
natural-born entrepreneur at all I don't
I've had to cultivate every Instinct now
I believe even instincts in fact
especially instincts are cultivated
maybe some people are wired for it out
of the gate okay awesome um but just
because you're not doesn't mean you
can't get good at it just may take you a
little bit longer you may have to put a
little bit more energy into it maybe you
have to put a lot more energy into it
but if you love it it makes you feel
come like you're coming alive you're
passionate about it then put the work in
I believe anyone can do anything they
set their mind to without limitation
period
um so that's just the truth now some
people may have to first solve the
problem of um eternal life because maybe
they just won't be able to do it fast
enough uh and I say this with a little
tongue and cheek but like you know I
plan to live forever um so I'm also
counting on people to solve some pretty
major problems around that uh but that
is that to me is just the truth of life
and I will ask people this one question
don't you hope I'm right and why would
you ever live in any way other than to
assume that I am right and cuz even Gary
I believe that what Gary's really saying
is hey know what you're good at but then
go get better at it right so he's not
saying like you can't improve he's just
saying like of all the things to put
your time and energy into getting really
good at don't start at something where
you're at a massive deficit and that's
the only thing that I think he and I
agree on is I say whatever you want to
do like what are your goals demand if
your goals demand that you get good at
something that you're at a deficit at
get good at something that you're at a
deficit at like my goals demanded that I
got good at being an entrepreneur period
so I had to get good at it it's
interesting that uh I'm glad we're
diving into this because it's one of the
things I picked up on in this episode is
he used the term DNA a lot um but he he
used it in a way that he was talking
about it almost like it's fixed but it's
also malleable right so he talks about
you have um if you're complaining you
have pessimistic DNA if you're not
complaining you have optimistic DNA but
then it's talking about the idea of
complaining like you can change that
it's about perspective right so which
which suggests that you're not just born
with this certain Outlook you can always
change it and then he also talks about
um going back to instincts what you were
saying the intuition he has with
identifying Trends and he said it's just
something I'm good at it's something I
do but then when he described it it's
like well he's just he's super curious
about everything and he's like oh well
if I see the slime thing then I'm
looking at on YouTube I'm asking people
about it and he's going through this
process that clearly I think he's honed
over time obviously has a very good
track record too of investing but um
yeah I I was surprised I think you're
right that even though you guys are sort
of opposed I think he also believes that
you know obviously you can get better at
things and work ethic is big for him
right hustle is big for him that's the
one thing he says you do have most
control over
yeah no question and look at the same
time I also get people are born with
inclinations and the brain is wired like
it's structured and the moment it's
structured the moment it's wired there
there's just going to be enough
variability that some people will be
better than others right it just is what
it is and then you're so shaped by your
environment as a kid growing up and the
ideology that you're fed like it all
plays in and the random experiences that
you have and I mean the fascinating
nature of looking at identical twins at
together identical twins that are raised
apart and like the things that they
Converge on that even though they you
know have never met like there's wild
similarities and then there are twins
that grew up together and even though
they're identical and grew up in the
same house they're wildly conver or
Divergent so
it it's just both it's just both and
so my thing is figure out like what
makes you come alive what are you going
to have fun pursuing and then if you're
going to have fun pursuing it it doesn't
matter if it comes naturally or not you
may have to work harder but like a a
perfect example so there are things in
my life that I'm utterly fascinated by
physics I am I am entranced by physics
in a way I can't quite
explain but math doesn't make any
intuitive sense for me so like
everything I've ever learned in math was
like clawing and scraping and so I'm not
in physics I consider it a a deep
interest deep interest but it's never
become a passion because I find the
acquisition of skills and that to be so
painful that going down that path I was
like eh but I know that if for whatever
reason if I had to do what I could and I
would buckle down and I would figure it
out and I would get better Brick by
Brick and over enough time I'd be able
to do the things that I needed to do but
I may never be effortless right in the
way that like if if you guys aren't
watching genius the story of Albert
Einstein watch it it's just great TV
first of all and is further proof that
people are breaking outside of their box
you know who who produces that no Nat
Geo National Geographic like what does
that have to do with Einstein nothing
but what people are realizing is a good
show is a good show is a good show and
it's no longer as much about like Hey
we're NBC and these are the kinds of
shows that we do hey we're Nao and these
are the kinds of shows that we do it's
like we have a platform we're going to
put out a great show we can use social
media to get a lot of attention for this
um very very exciting time to to be even
a consumer of this kind of content
anyway it's a great show and I really do
believe like there were just certain
things that he had early wins in then
that captured his imagination but at the
end of the day he pursued the things
that he loved that made him feel alive
and so that's that's my advice that way
even if you're slower than everybody
else even if you never um get worldly
success like everyone else if you're
having a ball doing it what does it
matter yeah uh going back to work ethic
so that's something that it seems like
was instilled in Gary through his
upbringing but when you asked him is he
going to instill that in his kids he
said no and that really threw me for a
loop what did you think about that um I
I think it's the only right answer and
the reason I think it's the right answer
is
because the only impossible job is
raising children like you never know
what like happens if you're trying to
push them in a certain direction and if
my advice to people is do what makes you
feel most alive but then when I had kids
I tried to mold them into like what I
value and what I think is right um it's
just a dangerous situation now I would
hope that they would pick up on from me
um that that matters and I would
absolutely recognize you're going to
paint a worldview for them whether you
want to or not and I would certainly say
look when you work hard like it's a
force multiplier you're going to get
more from your endeavors than if you
don't but you know to Gary's point be
yourself go all in on that do your thing
and be kind like teaching somebody
empathy I think is is super valuable and
that really really resonated with me so
I I think that part of him know like the
very fact that he won't let his kids win
he's not letting his kids win I think
not just because like he's got a
competitive streak I think he doesn't
let his kids win because he wants them
to earn the victories that they get I
actually think
that because of learned helplessness and
all that it's actually a dangerous
strategy um so if I were a parent that's
one thing I wouldn't do like I would
strategically make sure that I I took
them to the edge of their limits and
then let them get a victory that they
didn't earn in the hope that they would
believe that they had earned it but
that's like a whole another episode but
I'm utterly fascinated like have I ever
talked to you about the rats and how
they can so they can take a small rat
and and almost make it Invincible cuz
what they do is they take a small rat
and they pit it against larger rats but
they drug the larger rats so the smaller
rat wins and at first it like wins but
like oh God what's happening and then by
the end it will just Maul a bigger rat
because it's one time and time and time
again until you can actually pit it
against a bigger rat that isn't drugged
and you'll still [ __ ] it up because it
has so much confidence now the way that
you pull that off is intricate and very
difficult certainly with humans because
they can sense like wait am I being
manipulated so you have to be so careful
but like even the example that Gary
gives about his mom giving him like
encouragement and treating you know
holding the door open for somebody like
he had won the Nobel Prize um like those
things go a long way towards shaping
somebody so you know I mean look at the
end of the day I think any kid growing
up around Gary will understand the power
of work ethic and I think he knows that
yeah awesome all right let's go to our
Facebook live audience this one's from
Andrew sley I think is the last name um
psych to finally join you on a live feed
this episode was my introduction to Gary
ve thank you for that and loved when he
talked about his life feeling light and
him feeling Invincible that's what I
want for myself I believe he said that
embracing enjoying failure having an
intention to positively impact others
and being authentic are some keys to
that I want to ask Tom would you say
that life feels light to you or that you
feel Invincible if so what most
contributes to
that I definitely don't feel
Invincible
um I do feel light in the way that Gary
said it I never would have used that
word until he said that because my whole
thing is I I've lived through the
transition
of corporate veils were a real thing
people wanted to hide behind the company
when I first got into entrepreneurship I
did not want people to know who I was
because I didn't believe in the product
I didn't think the product was um it
wasn't something I cared about it like
solved the problem sort of but we were
like using fear based selling it's like
you're um you know people might be
stealing your corporate information it
was like like I hated it and so that
wasn't fun for me and so I was so
grateful that like that was all
invisible and I remember the first time
I heard of the notion of a corporate
veil and I thought oo I like that like
I'm hidden I'm behind something um that
actually gave me a great degree of
comfort and then as I started watching
what was happening with social media and
I got so fed up with not building
something that I cared about not being
passionate and this is back in 2009 when
we first started thinking about this so
and I always bring that up because I'm
proud of that moment like I'm proud that
like I wanted to do that as a reaction
to the way that I saw business being
done and I was like this is dumb like
people want to connect with people right
so it was me returning to like my roots
as a filmmaker as a director of somebody
who's obsessed with psychology and I was
like I think there's about to be a title
shift in the way that everything happens
right and I said look social media is
about to change everything and of course
we hav call it social media back then it
was basically like Facebook is about to
change everything and it's going to give
people a megaphone it's going to give us
a megaphone it's going to give the
consumer a megaphone it lets us have a
real dialogue it lets us build community
and that was my big thing I want to
build a community like I want people to
help each other I was like totally
obsessed with that notion I want people
to help each other like this is where we
can do something and I kept saying I
want a company with personality what I
meant by that was I want to be me I want
to show up every day and be me so I
became obsessed with this notion I am
only going to say things that if you
woke me up in the middle of the night
punched me in the head so now I'm dazed
and confused I don't know what's going
on and you asked me a question I'll give
you the same answer that I would give
you um in like a pre-recorded edited
interview because it's my North Star it
is the foundational belief system by
which I view the entire world that way I
never have to be worried about being cut
out I never have to worry about like
somebody secretly recording me or
whatever and I say something that
doesn't line up with what I've been
saying publicly and so the example that
I give is in the beginning um and I was
way more chill at Quest because I felt
like ah I have a brand like I really
have to balance this but I'm going to
swear and I'm going to swear because I
swear in real life and so like I didn't
want people to be like oh man cuz I
could see people begin to exaggerate you
like people perpetuate a version of me
like take my whole being up early thing
people have made out like I'm some di
hard that like sets my alarm and like I
get up and just grind grind grind my
thing is I go to bed early and no matter
how many times I say that people are
still like oh man you're so [ __ ]
hardcore like you wake up at 3:00 in the
morning it's like yes but I went to bed
at 9: so I still got 6 hours of sleep
and I didn't set an alarm I just woke up
so I'm not doing anything cool I'm not
doing anything special right but people
will take that and they run with it so
it's like I didn't want somebody I know
whatever I say is going to get
exaggerated the good and the bad and so
I didn't want people to like run with
something and begin to exaggerate like
oh he's you know this he oh he's so
loving and so kind and he doesn't even
swear and then they come in the office
and I'm like [ __ ] and then they
would it would be so jarring for them
and then it's like oh man this guy isn't
what I thought so it's like dude you
just got to be who you are like be
aggressive massively yourself
unapologetically you have to be nice all
right here's another question we got a
lot of new people in the comments today
seems like welcome everybody Rodrigo
Casas he says what would you recommend
to a 20-year-old who wants to start his
own business and hopes to have Financial
Freedom and be able to travel the world
without being attached to a traditional
9-to-5 job um my advice to anybody in
their early 20s goes like this go to the
person living your idealized life and
say I will work harder and smarter than
anybody else you've You' ever met I'll
do it for free for 90 days all I ask in
return is connections and knowledge if
at the end of the 90 days I've delivered
so much value that you'd rather pay me
to stay than lose me then put me on
payroll um and if not we shake hands we
part ways and I thank you for the
knowledge and information and you got
free labor um that is what I wish I had
done I could have shaved a lot of time
off my U Meandering um so there there's
just a magical period in your let's call
it teens to late 20s quite frankly where
poverty's fine and it doesn't matter
you're still going to be able to get
laid and this is something not a lot of
people talk about like at the end of the
day like that's what it's about like
it's about finding somebody that um it's
maximizing your sexual market value okay
and if you've never thought about sexual
market value sexual market value is real
so saying things like people should love
me for who I am it just doesn't
acknowledge the truth of sexual market
value so why will people always chase
money because it's real especially for
guys like you're valued for your access
to resources that's real is The Human
Condition that's just that's the way it
is and so especially for guys like
you're going to see like that they're
going to leverage that women are going
to try to do what they can to make
themselves look more beautiful uh
because they're prized for their beauty
hey maybe it shouldn't be that way but
it is that way um and
so yeah just acknowledging the the truth
of that Human Condition and we got on to
that because what was the initial
question uh getting Financial Freedom in
your 20s
world not having a 9 yeah so there it is
like go find somebody that can teach you
you need to be learning you need to be
in education mode get educated and look
I
lament I lament that it has taken me
this long to get to this point in my
life like I am literally just today I
was
mortified and uh but it's just how long
it took me to learn man it's just how
long it took me to learn there go all
right here's another one from someone
new to the feed this is Eli
officer I believe that is the last name
officer first live feed with you guys
love the show Mad thank you to agent
Smith and Tom and the entire impact team
thank you Eli um question what is it
that separates Gary from others as an
influencer in a cultural standpoint this
is a two-parter and how does one work uh
18 hour days seven days a week like