Kind: captions
Language: en
how do you make it stick your biggest
enemy is you
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[Music]
hey everybody welcome to another episode
of impact theory today
we are going to be talking all about
difficult people
all the things in your life that people
can do that might trip you up
this is something that as you begin to
master your own emotions as you begin to
implement
certain belief systems that are going to
allow you to progress in life
that focus you on you taking
responsibility suddenly you're going to
find that other people become a lot
easier to deal with but nonetheless
other people can be
a source of friction and learning how to
navigate that
well is really the difference between
being frustrated and hopeless and not
sure how to make things come true in
your life
and actually doing really great things
and this comes back to an african
proverb which i think is really
powerful which is if you want to go fast
go alone
if you want to go far go in a group if
you want to do something
really amazing with your life you are
absolutely going to have to figure out
how to work well with other people
and we all know that not everybody is as
easy
to deal with as each other so figuring
out how to navigate the particularly
tricky situations is critical
so that is what we're going to spend our
time on today
let's start off with this how do you
deal with toxicity
in the family what if my parents are
actually the difficult people to deal
with because of the mindset that they're
in
okay cut right to the chase on this one
man
because let me tell you a lot of people
struggle with their family now
here is
the hard reality to be faced for a lot
of toxic people
the right answer is to just distance
yourself to not be around them to
close that door create the boundaries
and make sure that you don't have to
deal with them
and the reality is that option is on the
table even for family
but if you guys are anything like me the
idea of
cutting them out of your life even if
they're difficult
i'm grateful that i don't have toxic
people in my immediate family that is
for sure
but nonetheless there are certain people
that i wouldn't cut out of my life
no matter what their mindset is and so
because that's the harder group to deal
with i want to address that first so
let's say that there's somebody in your
life it could be your parents could be a
sibling could be a loved one
and for whatever reason you're unwilling
to carve out that boundary and just say
i'm not going to have them in my life
then it becomes part of the toxicity
is that you're taking on what they're
saying and this is where i want you guys
to understand you don't even have to
make
a big scene about it when people try to
put something on me
tell me that i can't be something i
can't do something the way that i
live my life is a mistake and i'm
hurting myself and i'm hurting other
people
i don't have to take that on just
because they believe it and then
more importantly i don't have to
convince them otherwise
so it is okay for people to have a
negative opinion about you
and one thing that i want you guys to
understand is when somebody is coming at
something with that kind of negativity
when
where they live is a negative place
when their world view is this dark and
gloomy place
such that they feel the need to moralize
to other people to tell them what
they're doing is wrong that is such
a gnarly place to live
it is a corrosive mentality
and so people that imbue that
not only do you not need to take it on
not only do you not need to convince
them
but the thing that's probably going to
serve you the best in that moment
is compassion to understand
that living in that mentality
of self-righteousness of
seeing the faults in other people
without having the self-awareness
to see your own mistakes your own
foibles the
the problems with your own mentality to
be so outwardly focused
that you feel that you need to go around
telling other people how to live or to
judge them
that is a punishment unto itself and
part of the reason that it's a
punishment unto itself is
any time that you are looking to the
outside world for the problems you
fail to recognize in yourself
your own deficiencies which stop you
from progressing
now if i'm right that progress is a
foundational pillar to human happiness
which
everything i know about life and humans
reinforces that that is a true statement
then anything that stops you from seeing
yourself
clearly is something that holds you back
it stops you from having that progress
it stops you from building a life of joy
and at the end of the day living a
joyful life is really the sum total of
this so when people are coming after you
like that
and they're not coming to you from a
place of compassion or empathy
that darkness that bitterness that anger
that vitriol
is its own punishment it is corrosive it
does hold people back it will
stop them from ever having the joyful
life that they want the most joyful
people in the world the only fingers
they ever point
are thumbs and they point them back at
themselves
and when you look for
what you can control when you look for
the things that you can do differently
in
your life to get a different result now
all of a sudden you realize that
you're not out of control you're not
powerless there's no reason to feel
hopeless
because you can get better you can
improve you can recognize
where you are deficient you can
recognize what your goals demand of you
and then you can just go about building
that skill set improving yourself and
getting the outcomes that you want in
life
and that progress
that progress in and of itself is the
reward
it is the thing that leads to joy
having skill set that matters to you and
other people is the thing that leads to
fulfillment
and the very thing that makes people
attack you is
an outward focused gaze and those that
focus outward fail to
see the opportunities in themselves
so what i do when i'm around somebody
that is struggling even when it
manifests as an attack on me
is i remember i don't have to convince
them which is a huge thing for me to
realize it's okay for them to feel that
way
i don't have to change their mind which
will be a fruitless endeavor which will
only be frustrating for me
and i can do what they call loving
kindness which sounds really cheesy
but when you look at meditators who
practice
loving kindness it has a profound
psychological but also physiological
impact on the brain
so just be compassionate have empathy
fill your heart with love for that
person and whatever they're going
through
and honestly when you do that you'll be
surprised maybe not
in the immediate term but you'll be
surprised
on a long enough time scale how
that changes the energy between the two
of you it's what i call
just sit just sit with the person just
be with them
don't try to change them don't worry
about what they think about you
just sit just be
and that's it then all the toxicity that
they have
cannot permeate your mind
and no matter how toxic the outside
world is if it doesn't permeate your
mind
it doesn't really matter at least not
for you
and that's my advice when you can't get
away from somebody who's toxic
next how do you deal with people that
show irritation
when you speak but don't address what
their problem is
i love this one okay so here's what i do
i call that [ __ ] out in real time
now i don't call it out like yo
[ __ ] what are you doing i call
it out like
hey let me know if i'm misreading but
you really seem frustrated
it is so scandalous nobody ever does
that nobody ever
acknowledges the elephant in the room
people feel like
they can say something however they want
to say it and you're only going to be
able to comment on the actual words that
they say
which is [ __ ] that's some weird
convention that
just isn't true and if you take the time
to say
hey totally i could be misreading this
but you seem frustrated
no no i'm not frustrated at all you're
coming across aggressive
and if you can help me understand why
because if there's something that i'm
doing or saying that's upsetting you
i want to understand it and if you're
saying that not as a gotcha
but really actually trying to understand
it like you're you're trying to disarm
the situation you are more than prepared
to point those two thumbs at you you're
more than prepared for you to actually
have done something that you didn't see
that might have upset that person that
might they might really have a
legitimate
grief and if you
come at it from that standpoint and
you're not trying to
trick them trap them you're just
actually trying to understand
that desire to understand and when they
realize there's nowhere to hide because
you're going to point out the way that
something is being delivered and by the
way i will throw people a lifeline
so when i say hey you know i'm really
just trying to understand you seem
upset frustrated agitated
help me see because if i did something i
would want to address that and then if
they
keep demonstrating that they're angry
but keep saying that they're not
then i would just say help me understand
the
the level of aggression that's coming
across now do you think i'm just
misinterpreting it
whatever and so then we go down that
path now
in a fantasy land there's somebody
nearby
that you can actually pull in and so at
impact theory we always tell people
don't go have one of these arguments
alone
grab another peer or in the case of a
company somebody that you report to
to essentially moderate the discussion
so you could say hey if you think i'm
misinterpreting
the signal and that there is no
frustration or agitation here
i'm perfectly willing to um be told that
i'm just misreading the situation
and so then if it's like um
they're having a hard time recognizing
that they're being frustrated
if we were alone and there's nobody
there to moderate then i might say
something by way of a lifeline like
you know is it possible that when i said
this that that hit you the wrong way
and so you sort of pre-masticate the
idea for them
maybe you have an insight that they're
unable to have and recognizing that a
lot of times
people are angry but they don't have the
self-awareness to understand what's
happening
so they're getting frustrated they're
angry about something but they're not
even sure
why or what they're angry with now as
somebody who's had that happen to me
where i'm like
why the hell am i getting sharp all of a
sudden i have
nothing but empathy and compassion for
whoever's going through that
so again i'm not trying to trap them i
don't want them to look bad i'm going to
help them
navigate their way out of this and i'm
not trying to win i'm not trying to
prove anything i'm trying to
understand and if you go into it trying
to understand
now the other person feels that you can
pull you can hand that olive branch or
you can say hey why don't we take a
minute
go our separate ways let's come back
rediscuss this
and i'll try to see if i can understand
what i might have said that upset you
or to understand why i'm misreading you
or whatever and
if that's sincere and you're not just
trying to trick them
then i think you'll be shocked at how
far that goes i use that in my marriage
all the time we each do with each other
if the other person is like getting
agitated
instead of pretending that they're not
in the most
gentle loving reconciliatory way
we're trying to figure out what happened
and over time especially when people see
you do this and you're not trying to be
like hahaha i told you i knew it
you're pissed you're being petty
whatever then over time
people are able to slow down they
realize you have good intentions which
gives them the ability to self-reflect
because it's very hard
when things are elevated like that right
so when you're in fight-or-flight mode
which is probably why they're getting
agitated
blood is actually leaving the prefrontal
cortex which is the seat of higher level
cognition which means they're going to
have a harder and harder time the more
agitated they get if you're coming at
them
they're going to have a harder time
recognizing what's actually going on
so helping to defuse the situation
through a desire to understand
and through compassion goes a really
long way
but then don't just let people act like
they're not
displaying aggression or frustration or
whatever because that's what i call
crazy making
there it is all right how do you deal
with people who refuse to accept they
are wrong
they get aggressive if you try to
convince them their opinion is wrong and
confuse their opinion with facts
okay so this is a really tricky
situation
and if you're dealing with somebody who
is just hell-bent to be combative
then just recognize you're never going
to win
and so trying to convince them makes no
sense
it is a fruitless moment and
you are probably if you're human are
prone as they
entrench themselves more and more into
their position you more and more want to
show them
that they're wrong now if a person is
feeling
defensive they're feeling attacked the
odds of them
having the sort of emotional wherewithal
to go you know what actually you're
right
because most people build their
self-esteem around being right
so as they back themselves into this
position refusing to admit
that they're wrong and in this instance
i'm assuming they
actually are wrong which by the way it's
entirely possible that you're both
sort of just arguing at each other
instead of actually trying to understand
each other which might
really be the root of the problem is
that we have a two-way street problem
here
but let's just assume for a second that
they actually are just
wrong empirically the the facts don't
line up
i know about humans that the more
they're being defensive the more they
feel attacked the more they feel
attacked i know that their self-esteem
is on the line here
this feels like an attack on them as a
person not an attack on their ideas
so even though for you this is about
just we're just discussing facts here
for them their whole world view may be
under attack and they're not going to be
able to acknowledge that so if this is
an
issue where you have to achieve common
ground and you can't just say
you know i've essentially i've tried and
walk away and save yourself that
aggravation
if there's some reason like this is a
business discussion or we're talking
about raising
how we're going to raise our kids or
whatever where there's no way to just
agree to disagree and walk away like we
actually have to come to a conclusion
then when you're in that moment asking
questions
can be really powerful so if somebody
makes
an assertion then just say
what's that assertion based on and then
if they're like they're giving you
something that's feelings
then what i will do in a moment like
that is i'll say i just want to lay down
some you know base assumptions or
parameters that we can agree on
and then i'll say can we agree
that neither of us are experts in this
field
yes we can agree on that okay does it
seem sensible for us to appeal
to an expert opinion on the subject yes
it does
can we mutually agree on who an expert
is now if we can agree on who an expert
is
as defined as somebody who's had success
in that area three times or more
then it's like okay well let's go see
what the experts say on this or let's
get um
multiple experts we'll pick three of
five and see if you know there's
consensus on the issue or if we're in a
company if there's somebody else in that
company
that's a recognized expert in that field
what do they think but some way to
lay essentially the groundwork for how
we're going to determine
what is and isn't accurate because what
people end up doing as you very aptly
pointed out
is they have formed an opinion which is
based on their life their assumption
maybe headlines they've heard whatever
they've taken on that
notion that ideology whatever it is that
we're talking about
and now they've infused that with their
sense of self
and so being able to tease that all
apart is very
very difficult and one of the only ways
to get somebody to reflect on that
rather than
telling them anything is to ask them
questions
so asking them why they believe
something asking them how we're going to
determine what a fact is
who an expert is what we should be
listening to not listening to and
by the way in that if they continue to
give
irrational answers at least you'll be
able to figure out sort of where the
irrational answer lies
and if somebody is just determined to be
irrational if somebody is entrenched in
their opinion and it becomes their
identity
is wrapped up in this at some point you
really have to understand
that you're having what i call a
collision of values and
the only way out of that is to try to
steal man each other's arguments
and so if you can state their side very
clearly and succinctly generously with
warmth like
actually trying to understand where
they're coming from and that they can do
the same for you
now you at least can say yes you
understand my position
perfectly and i understand your position
perfectly like you're each acknowledging
that the other person has actually been
able to articulate
generously your position and so it's
like yes i have there's no nuance left
you completely understand it
but now we still disagree okay now
you've hit a collision of values
now there's no layer to go beyond that
now you just have to either say okay
well
there's no way for us to come to an
agreement on this because we both
see this whole situation very
differently
we value different things in this moment
and
when you're there when you know that
this is a collision of values one of you
either has to adopt the other person's
values or you have to walk away
there won't be any coming to a
conclusion on that
and you know we're obviously living
through a point now where
people are doing that more and more
algorithms are sort of
pushing people into these really siloed
really like
hardcore ultra like processed versions
of any idea
that's like driving people farther and
farther apart and
the only way back is for people to
recognize
that the other person has value that the
other person
deserves compassion and warmth and that
again going back to my earlier answer if
they're so dogmatic
and so letting their identity get
wrapped up in that
that's its own punishment and and is
pathology
and they will never be able to see the
world clearly and move forward
in a a functioning way and so being
somebody who is truly open-minded who is
looking for the right answer
as determined by i have a goal what
answer moves me towards that goal
right and so that goal though is that's
part of that values making sure that
we're actually aiming at the same thing
which can be an important question to
ask
where are we trying to end up because if
you're both trying to end up in the same
place it gets a lot easier but if you
recognize we're actually both trying to
end up in different places
then we know okay at least we can
acknowledge that we're both trying to
end up in different places
so again this comes back to
wanting to be able to understand wanting
to be able to articulate their side
not trying to force them admitting
admitting that they're wrong which most
people will not
be able to do they just won't have the
emotional wherewithal to pull that off
and so trying to get people to do that
is very very
difficult it makes it about winning and
losing
and you're triggering a natural human
tendency to defend and so you're just
not going to get what you want
so i would do everything i could to let
go of right and wrong and just focus on
understanding
i know that's not very satisfying
especially in a world where people want
to dunk on each other
that's part of the problem i hope you
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[Music]
all right i'm a cashier at walmart and i
encounter a lot of rude and obnoxious
customers however
i know it is my duty to treat them with
respect but it can be difficult
any tips on how to approach troubled
people while being honest
straightforward and genuine
so this comes down to what you value in
the exchange
i like jordan peterson's idea of tell
the truth or at least try
not to lie sometimes
there can be a truth that we leave
unsaid
because this is a momentary interaction
where i would say kindness is the higher
value
than pointing out every flaw that we see
or every bit of
obnoxious behavior because at some point
it just spirals into madness
to point out every misstep that somebody
is doing
and so when i look at somebody that is
being obnoxious being rude my goal is to
shift their energy
how can i get them back into a place
where they're feeling good
they're feeling warmth they are
in a place where they feel kind right
because most people
it isn't that they are incapable of
kindness and if they are like imagine
how shitty that life would be somebody
who never experiences kindness
joy warmth connection that would truly
be its own hell
so i'm not going to
worry about pointing out every obnoxious
thing that they're doing
and i would play a game with myself of
how much joy can i spread and
in some ways you are
leaving a truth unsaid which is that
they're being unkind
or obnoxious or whatever
but by trying to spread kindness you're
not lying
and especially if
you share that value with me of wanting
to just put as much
good vibes into the world as you can and
look i'm not perfect and there is no
doubt that sometimes
people are just like god damn like i
just don't want anything to do with it
but that doesn't feel like me at my best
me at my best feels like all right cool
can we switch this energy around can we
get them to
soften to feel that human warmth and a
bit of connection and can i
i mean with a smile you'll be shocked
how much you can change somebody's
demeanor so that's how i would flip it i
would just
see how much joy can i spread even when
people are being problematic to me
now that doesn't mean that i'd let
people abuse me or anything like that i
don't
i imagine you guys can get a pretty good
guess about
uh what i'm like i don't let people walk
over me or be a dick to me or whatever
but i find it far more interesting to
try to change somebody's energy
than to get them to go yeah i am being a
dick that's just not interesting to me
trying to get them to sort of confess
that they're the problem
i'd much rather hold myself accountable
to like how much
sort of emotional jujitsu can i do here
all right next question
how do i know if i'm being a difficult
person
well the fact that you're asking the
question is already gives me a
tremendous amount of hope
and ultimately you're just going to have
to pick up on
cues so look at how people leave
a an exchange with you are they leaving
feeling more upbeat
is there a positive energy between the
two of you
um do you feel yourself getting agitated
or flustered a lot
um because i don't think people set out
to be
difficult i think what happens is their
insecurity gets triggered they're they
feel like they're being attacked they're
you know like one of the most just
gnarly positions to be in is to feel
like you're supposed to think this way
and this is supposed to be your stance
and you can't really defend it it makes
you a little bit insecure and so when
people come after you and you know
that like you feel like you're being
outmatched intellectually oh god like
you just
launch in with ad hominem attacks and
you make it personal and you
you know it's name-calling it's oh this
person's an idiot whether you say it out
loud or internally
and if you find yourself in that
position feeling like that feeling
agitated feeling defensive
then odds are that you are being
difficult because difficult isn't about
i'm setting out to be a jerk it's ooh
something has triggered an insecurity in
me
and now i'm not at my best i'm not in my
most compassionate i'm not at my most
open i'm not at my most friendly i'm not
trying to elevate other people i'm not
trying to spread
joy and warmth and all of that right i'm
defensive i feel like i'm
you know in a sort of intellectual
boxing match maybe i'm trying to win
all of that stuff is
exactly what it feels like to be the
difficult person right
that's what's so fascinating about this
is
we all think the other person is being
difficult when in reality
there's probably something that we could
have done differently to have that
exchange go in a completely different
direction
and instead of focusing on how difficult
that person is being
asking like how could we do a bit of
emotional jiu-jitsu in this moment
and get the kind of outcome that we want
so having that self-awareness
understanding the body sensations that
you're getting being able to interpret
them and then ideally
being able to dial them back so this is
really a
the ability to build the self-awareness
around
excuse me around the emotions that
you're having and uh there's a book
called
how emotions are made by lisa feldman
barrett
that goes into great detail about how
you can do that and i highly recommend
that book
all right how do you deal with someone
who when losing an argument
grabs at other topics they've had issues
with in the past
and brings those in to argue about
instead of finishing the current
argument and admitting they're wrong
okay so interesting if you want people
to admit that they're wrong there are
going to be times
there are going to be times in fact
there are definitely times where i am
focused on explaining why i think i'm
right
now when i do that
whoever i'm discussing with because they
know my stance right don't worry about
being right just try to find the right
answer now what do you do
when you're not worried about being
right but you really believe you have
the right answer
so now you're in this pickle right so
not worried about
them admitting that they're wrong if you
find yourself wanting somebody to admit
that they are wrong
already the energy is in the wrong place
so now if you're trying to
explain to somebody why you're right
because it matters
now when it doesn't matter that's the
time to just let that [ __ ] go
but if it matters right again how we
raise the kids
[Music]
what should we do with our finances
who are
somebody we're working with how they're
engaging how we talk to our boss
whatever
things where it's like okay the outcome
of this thing actually does have
consequences
and so we have to see this room okay so
first of all
if i think that i'm right i'm going to
present my case
i'm going to be as succinct as i can i'm
going to recognize that communication is
difficult
that i have what i call base assumptions
so what i'm trying to do
is get to the point where we're being
understood so
we're doing the steel man thing right so
now i'm gonna say
all right i'm gonna try to make my
explanation as
simple as i can because if you
understand it well you should be able to
make it quite simple
so if you find that you're doing run-on
sentences and you know
rants trying to get them on board you
may not understand it clearly enough
yourself so you may be speaking so that
you can be
understood sorry so that you can
understand yourself
rather than so that you can be
understood and recognizing when you're
speaking so that you can understand
is very important so i'm going to status
succinctly
then i'm going to ask them if they can
steal man my argument
now if somebody is discussing this with
you in good faith
then they should be able to generously
present your argument back to you
now if they can't you'll at least
understand which part of it is
that they're missing now once they can
steal men your argument and they can say
as articulately as you what your
position is
and then they say and i still disagree
and i disagree for this reason
now at least we know what we're arguing
about
but the problem is when somebody's
bringing in a new topic or whatever
people just let the like scope creep go
they're like
maybe they're getting confused as well
and so in those moments what i do is i
just take it on myself and say
look i'm getting a little bit confused
so i'm not sure where you're going with
that there may be a completely valid
reason why you're bringing that thing in
i don't yet understand it i'm worried
that you may not fully understand my
argument which by the way may be
because i'm not explaining it well so if
we could i'm just going to
quickly state my whole thesis right
super succinctly like in a sentence or
two
and if you can't do that you don't
understand it well enough
so i'm gonna give it to him in a sense
or two and i'm gonna say
can you repeat my stance back to me just
so that i
know that we're on the same page and
that is one way to keep the argument
grounded
so that as they begin reaching for
something else we call it out
generously not like what the [ __ ] why
are you bringing that up that doesn't
have anything to
right that posturing matters and forces
everybody into these more and more
defensive postures so
with that generosity the true desire to
understand you're gonna
take it and break it down piece by piece
and that's the key let's just take it
one piece at a time here's my thesis
this is why i say this this is why i
think this is right
what's your thesis okay that's your
thesis that's why you think that's right
right we have two conflicting
views so now when we can both
explain each other's sides we can
diffuse that situation
we can stop the scope creep of the
argument we can keep things just to
the facts but if you're not able to
state those things okay we're going
somewhere that feels like it's outside
outside the scope of this discussion
right re-ground it
if you're not able to state your thesis
then things just start going everywhere
and what people are doing
and this is this was a really powerful
realization for me and unfortunately i
forget who said this
but oftentimes people speak
not so that they can be understood but
so that they can
understand so they are trying to talk
their way through a problem they're
trying to figure it out in real time
verbally processing out loud
and so i'll actually say to people are
you just processing verbally out loud
right now because
i might be able to help but
when i think that you're trying to
present an argument
like you actually believe this you think
this is true but you're sort of all over
the map and you're wandering around ah i
can't [ __ ] follow you
and so that gets crazy-making so now
just say it seems like you're speaking
so that
you can sort of think through this which
i'm here for
let me help you and giving them the
space to like walk through it you'll be
shocked at how
people will just be like actually you
know what you're right i can't say my
position
in two sentences i am just talking
through this
so that i can understand something and
now it's like if you're generous in that
moment and are like hey cool
like you know i'll give you the space
right i'm not going to interject
like go until you feel like you've
really got it out
or ask the same like hey i'm actually
not entirely sure what my position is
and i just need for a second i just need
a sounding board if you can give me like
three minutes i'll even time it i will
legitimately do i will take my phone out
and hit a timer so i don't get crazy
long and
just say hey i just need to process
through this man when you do that kind
of framework conversation around it
of like here's what i think my thesis is
or you know what i just need a minute to
think through this or hey this feels
like scope creep
when you start just stating this stuff
okay the scaffolding of the conversation
you actually
call attention to it man it just lowers
everybody's stress people don't feel
backed into a corner they feel like they
can really get to something
and then don't be afraid to hit the
pause button and come back
all right at the end of the day
if you almost play a game with yourself
and say i want to see if i can change
the energy of somebody who's being
difficult i want to see if i can
stay compassionate generous kind
warm through all of this don't get me
[ __ ] wrong sometimes it's
really hard especially if it's your kids
or
your parents or your spouse like it can
be
hard i get it but as we
try to be our best selves and present
ourselves in a way that's going to get
us what we want which is a harmonious
relationship which is
the ending of the difficulty by looking
at what we could do to change that
situation
you will be shocked at how far that goes
figuring out how to point out the
scaffolding of a conversation
is huge breaking things down into small
pieces
being generous and articulating their
stance recognizing a collision of values
and knowing hey
if we can't agree on where we're trying
to end up if we can't agree on what the
value
is this is going to be a fruitless
conversation
and the sooner you recognize that's
where you're at and that you need to
actually talk about the value or
just go your separate ways the healthier
all of your relationships are going to
be
and then just lead with kindness and
recognize that people that think
differently
that's important and we shouldn't want
everybody to see the world exactly the
way that we see it
and if we can come at things from that
perspective of trying to understand
before we try to be understood
you're going to find that a lot of that
difficulty just goes by the wayside
and that's how i deal with difficult
people all right guys
not only do i hope that adds value i
really think if you actually do those
things
it will change your life this is one of
the ways that i'm able to navigate in
the business world
you're inevitably going to need to
partner with people that don't see the
world the same as you you can have
employees that don't see the world the
same as you
and if you can't navigate this you're in
real trouble same in my marriage they're
inevitably going to be things where you
don't see the same and being able to
navigate a situation where sometimes
you're going to be convinced the other
person is [ __ ] with me
they are literally going out of their
way to try to be difficult and then you
realize
it's actually not true we just don't see
eye to eye on this issue and i'm sure
from their shoes
i seem just as difficult as they seem to
me
and when you point them thumbs back at
yourself and look at what you can do the
world gets a whole
lot better all right that's it this is
added value
be sure to subscribe until next time my
friends be
legendary take care peace
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