Kind: captions
Language: en
[Music]
hey everybody welcome to another episode
of impact theory today my friends we are
going to be talking all about
accountability and this is a critically
important thing no matter what you're
trying to do in your life
holding yourself responsible holding
yourself
to a standard making sure that if you
say you're going to do something that
you're going to do it and honestly
there's no more important person to
impress with your accountability than
yourself
and i
will remind myself very frequently that
i am very careful about what i promise
myself i'm going to do but once i
promise myself i'm going to do something
then i'm going to do it i am going to
see it through and there's nothing that
i'm going to let get in my way slow me
down stop me and when you come into
something with that attitude as jocko
willing says there's freedom in that
there's freedom in that discipline of
knowing i will see this through and the
power that that brings to your life is
really
it's intoxicating and it's liberating to
believe in yourself to know that if you
say you're going to do something that
you're going to follow it through it's
one of the key elements to build into
your personality and we're going to be
talking all about that today so without
further ado my friends
let's jump right in
so number one what exactly is
accountability what does it lead to so
as i basically stated in the intro there
accountability is saying
i'm going to do this thing and then
actually doing that thing so if you tell
somebody you're going to show up for
them make sure that you show up if you
say that you're going to do something to
the best of your ability make sure make
sure that you do it to the best of your
ability and
knowing that
you are
going to be held account i mean that's
literally what it means that there's
going to be a record that they're in
fact that is the right way to think
about it even if you can fool the world
there will be an account
of your actions in your own mind now to
me that's the far more interesting part
about accountability is your own
subconscious is going to hold you
accountable for the things you do or
don't do the way that you show up how
hard you play
so for instance i tell people all the
time that you know i get out of bed in
10 minutes or less
but how do you really know
but i know
and i know that if i want to feel good
about myself when i tell other people
that i get out of bed in 10 minutes or
less then i actually have to
show up and do that because my mind is
going to hold me accountable to what i
said then as you start to build trust
with people that you care about people
that are around you then it really is
they're holding you account to your
actions they hold you accountable for
not only the things that you say that
you're going to do but just the way that
you show up for them whether you are
holding whether you're living up to
the social contract that we all have
either implicitly
or explicitly so you may actually say
especially to a significant other this
is what i expect of you and then whether
or not that person is able to deliver on
that they're going to be held
accountable for that
so
this is a game of internal
accountability the way that you
judge yourself for how you show up and
do something and then external
accountability the way that people hold
you accountable now what do you get out
of that what you get out of it is
self-respect in the case of
holding yourself accountable saying this
is how i think someone should be okay
explicit or implicit so you may have
never outlined how you believe that you
should show up for yourself and for
other people but it's there you have a
value system and when you act in
accordance with that value system stated
or unstated you're going to feel good or
badly about yourself depending on
whether you
meet those requirements that you have in
your own mind okay so when i talk about
the only thing that really matters is
how you feel about yourself when you're
by yourself that's what i'm talking
about do you have that self-respect
which is one of the outcomes of holding
yourself
accountable to the things you said you
were going to do to the things you said
were important to you to the things that
matter to you in your life do you show
up and meet those challenges do you
show courage right it's a value
do you show courage do you
react poorly
act
fearfully in ways that you don't respect
okay so that's the
the element of what you get from the
internal side then the external side how
you are with other people whether you
can be counted on whether you show up
for people in the way that they want you
to show up in the way that you think you
should show up then that's how you
establish and build real relationships
where people know that they can trust
you where people know that they can rely
on you and that is ultimately how you
build a strong social network and as a
social animal that's an incredibly
important thing to do so this is
basically you're going to be held
account held to account excuse me for
your behaviors and for those ways that
people think you should be and the way
that you yourself think that you should
be and the consequences are
emotional in nature but are incredibly
incredibly important
all right with that
now establishing that baseline of
exactly what accountability is let's
move on to the next one
what is the relationship between
accountability and authority and how
does that relate to credibility trust
and reliability okay so accountability
and authority i will say they have
very little to do with each other
depending on which
definition of authority you have so if
you're trying to be an authority in
something so let's say for instance i'm
trying to be an authority in uh
lifestyle advice okay well if i'm not
holding myself accountable and i'm
interacting with people poorly then i'm
not going to have much authority so in
that area because people are going to
say well this guy doesn't even do what
he preaches so you would have some of
that but i don't naturally think of
those two things as being
related but certainly that is um
the connection that i would see between
those two now that you have prompted me
but that's definitely not something i've
thought about before now how does that
relate to credibility so going with that
definition of an authority where if
you're trying to present yourself as
being good at something then you better
be living up to the things that you say
and this is the same idea as leading
from the front if you're going to ask
other people to
do things a certain way like i'm really
hardcore about the culture here at
impact theory now for me to say hey the
culture matters and all of that well
then i better be living up to that
culture i better be leading from the
front if i'm saying hey i look only for
hardcore [ __ ] i want people
that really believe in the mission and
show up every day fighting to make sure
that that comes to fruition
if i
don't come and fight harder than anybody
else then of course i'm not going to
have that credibility in the eyes of my
team they need to see that i'm living it
if they're going to follow me in
something so that's a really important
example of how you earn credibility with
other people but now let's talk about
the more important part which is earning
credibility with yourself
this was one of the big breakthroughs in
my life was realizing that if i said i
was going to do something
and i wanted to give up on it
i would think about well if i position
it this way if i move this way if i kind
of hide this from that person and sweep
this under the rug over here then i can
still manage other people's
beliefs about who i am
and as long as other people think that
i'm cool i'm good i'm talented i'm smart
whatever then i'm good
and what i realized is a that only works
50 of the time so 50 of the moves that
you make to try to um
manage your
persona
50 of the time it works the other fifty
percent of the time though people see
through it and then you begin to earn
the reputation of being a [ __ ]
artist so what i realized was okay not
only does it not work as well externally
as i think but it doesn't matter what
the outside world thinks if i don't
think positively of myself so that
became my obsession is understanding
credibility is
most important when you're talking about
self-credibility and how we earn
credibility with ourselves is by saying
i'm going to do this thing and then
doing it and then you just keep inching
that out farther and farther and farther
until you get to the point where you
show up for yourself in the most extreme
and difficult of circumstances so i'll
tell you guys a story
at my old house i used to have this
painting of the michael jordan flu game
hanging above my fireplace and
that
was so inspiring to me
and i always said
i put that up there to remind myself of
what i'm capable of and how i would
react if i were put in a championship
game situation and then lo and behold
flash forward probably a year later and
i actually get the flu and i have a
double episode the next day
and i remember i had a fever i was
rocked i could barely stand up it was
really miserable and i had to do all the
prep the day before for the episodes
and i was like i actually don't know
if i'm going to be able to make it
through this like
that's how sick i was it's one of the
sickest i've ever been
how do you make it stick your biggest
enemy is you
[Music]
hey everybody today's episode is brought
to you by impact theory university's own
business decision making workshop if
you're a business owner looking to scale
your company i can help i've created a
four-week intensive workshop that's
going to give you the decision-making
strategies that you need to scale your
company it's the exact things that i use
to take quest to a billion dollar exit
and it's exactly what i'm using today on
impact theory that's allowed us to grow
by 400 in just the last two years this
sounds like something that would be
beneficial to you and your business i
want you to go right now to decision dot
impact theory dot com to apply once
again that's decision
decision.impacttheory.com
you can apply today all right i'll see
you on the inside
and in that moment i remembered
one lead from the front so
show people that i've always told my
team i will show up for you
if we have something important planned
i'm always going to show up and you
never have to worry about whether i'm
going to put in the work and be there
for you so i was like all right i'm
going to hold myself accountable to that
and my team even if they
understood some part of them would know
well then if i say the next time hey
guys don't worry i'll always show up for
you they'll be like hey i get it man but
look if you get sick you get sick
that isn't what i wanted what i wanted
is for them to know i am the hardest
core [ __ ] on the planet earth
and i'm gonna show up and i'm gonna play
to the best of my abilities no matter
what i will not back down and so i did
that prep work i got checked i spent
whatever 12 hours researching that day
and preparing for the two episodes the
next day and then the next day still
sick as a [ __ ] dog we let the guests
know and we said tom is sick
so it's up to you we completely
understand if you don't want to come and
both of them said nope we still want to
come and we filmed the episodes and it
was hard and if you know which episodes
they are you will certainly be able to
tell that i was six i could barely speak
but
showing up and still giving a good
interview
meant the world to me it was so
gratifying to say
i said i would show up in a moment like
this i have that painting hanging up
above my fireplace and i showed up fever
no fever healthy sick rain sleet snow it
doesn't matter i'm gonna show up now the
amount of credibility that i earned with
myself in that moment was extraordinary
and i had earned it in a thousand little
ways leading up to that moment which of
course was why i felt confident in
saying i will show up for you saying it
to the team i knew it wasn't rhetoric i
knew i would be there for them because i
had been earning credibility with myself
for years and years and years constantly
pushing out what i was capable of doing
right
another one
i told the 10-minute rule everybody
knows that one but another one was i
told myself leading up to uh or just
after i think the interview that i did
with wim hof i said i'm going to do 30
days of cold showers
and not only did i do 30 days of cold
showers i ended up doing uh a year and
three months
and so over delivering on something like
that which i hated by the way i hated
every single cold shower that i took but
it was so powerful to say i'm going to
do this and then showing up for myself
day after day after day after day even
though i didn't want to do it that
credibility respecting yourself
believing in yourself knowing you will
show up for yourself is one of the most
extraordinary gifts anybody can ever
give themselves ever in your life there
is nothing that will feel better
than having credibility with yourself
now trust and reliability same things
but those are more outward focusing
they're certainly whether you trust
yourself or not but i'll lump that very
similar to credibility but other people
being able to trust
that is a big deal and trust really is
probably the foundational layer to any
healthy relationship is whether you can
trust that person now trust comes in a
lot of forms so going back to this idea
of there's like a social contract
between people and
in fact this is a really
an
idea that may be too sort of nuanced for
this conversation
but this idea of a collision of values
between people and this is i think the
most dangerous thing in a romantic
relationship is when you have a
collision of values
that you don't recognize as a collision
of values you just each think the other
person is wrong
it's a fascinating idea and i go into
this in great detail on relationship
theory which if you're not already
subscribed to relationship theory head
over to youtube right now
so i talk about that in the context of
relationships for now i just want to say
that when you get into
trust and what builds trust
understanding that
we have these social contracts with each
other there are things that we expect of
each other we have these invisible
values
and being able to understand
what the other person expects of you
what you expect of them and then being
able to communicate that because when
somebody has an expectation of you or
you have an expectation of somebody else
you're holding them accountable to that
value system whether you articulate it
or not
and so it becomes
this thing when friendships break apart
it's very possible that one of the
parties is just egregious drugs alcohol
whatever but normally when you get that
breakdown it's because you have two
different value systems at work and one
person thinks that their way of acting
is completely acceptable and the other
person thinks that oh my god that's
egregious so take being on time for
instance one person may think that being
on time is critically important and they
may never have even said that to them
it's just self-evident they grew up in a
household you're on time being on time
is a sign of respect right
so that's all happening invisibly you
show up a few minutes late you grew up
in a household where it was like ah it's
no big deal you show up with love and
affection and you know whether you get
there on time an hour late whatever it
doesn't really matter right just being
there for that person that's what really
matters and so now you've got these two
people boom they've got a collision of
values they've never articulated that
you're being held accountable
for something that you weren't aware of
and that's how a lot of friendships end
up eroding because
people run into this tendency of not
even recognizing that these values are
not objective truth they are something
that either you decided on or were
indoctrinated in you essentially by the
way that you grew up so be very
thoughtful
about the languages of the other person
the values the love language how they
like to communicate so that you are
actually understood in the way that you
want to be understood because you are
being held accountable to that person's
values not just your own a really
interesting thing to think about as
you're building trust because that
person wants to know can they trust you
to act in accordance with their values
now the other element of trust of course
is just saying
i'm going to do this and then actually
doing it but there are many unwritten
rules in say take relationships for
example it's very easy you'll never
cheat on me okay so but at what point
did we start being exclusive for some
people that's first date for some people
that's first kiss for other people may
not be until the first time you've had
sex so
that can
one person's action may feel like a
gross violation of trust uh to the other
person and seem completely normal to you
so you have to be very thoughtful about
understanding that dance so that can get
very very complicated now reliability
gets into something much simpler which
is
somebody asks will you do this
you say yes and then you actually do it
they can count on you to do the things
you say that you're going to do
and the idea of your word being your
bond
is i think very powerful i think is
something that's very underrated for
people
and is something to be
it's something that you can leverage in
your life if
there's a really great quote that says
you don't divorce the same person that
you marry
now what they mean by that is
some people's
word
shifts
given the circumstances
and so
let's say you say to somebody
i would never
be mean to you just by way of example
and then something happens in the
relationship and you feel that the other
person has been mean to you and so for
many people that's a reason now that
they can be mean back even though
they've said i'll never be mean to you
and so all of this stuff begins to play
into this
high level
reliability in terms of can i trust
we're back at that word can i trust you
to be the person that you say you are in
all circumstances now to me
being that kind of reliable being the
kind of person that is who they say they
are
no matter how the situation changes i
find that utterly fascinating that the
person somebody projects in their you
know public life is the same as what
they're living
internally is the same as they're living
in their relationships
and
that's a person that you can
trust to
do what they say they're going to do in
the way that they say they're going to
do it and that to me is reliability now
imagine when you have somebody that is
trustworthy
reliable
and
they're reliable to themselves
and
other people can rely on them to show up
when they need them
as a social creature
having that kind of connection with
other people
is
very powerful when you think about
we're able to do so much more as a part
of a group than we are by ourselves
that's how you build a really strong
foundation whether it's in your family
your friend group or at work
so
those are
incredibly important words and
attributes to understand
as
there are a few things people respect
more than the ability to trust you and
knowing that you're reliable
you can fail
you can make mistakes
but
if you
do the things you say you're going to do
if you try your best if you give it your
all if you
really honor
the statements that you make and the
promises that you make
people will hold you in high esteem even
if
something like you know you have a
business and it collapses you get into
debt and you lose your house whatever
you might think that people are going to
think less of you but if you have
that kind of credibility trust
reliability i think you'll be surprised
at how many people rally to your aid
i hope you guys are enjoying this
episode which is brought to you by
impact theory university's business
decision making workshop with nine
full-length classes and weekly live case
studies with me the business decision
making workshop is a hands-on approach
to honing your abilities to scale your
business i'm going to be in there with
you working through your hardest
problems so that you'll be able to
master how to overcome any impediment by
getting the most foundational way to
think through
novel problems and that my friends is
exactly what you need to do if you want
to scale your company and have the kind
of crazy success you've always dreamed i
promise it is possible this is teachable
this is something that you can learn it
is a process that you can deploy against
your business and be able to move
confidently forward just go right now to
decision.impacttheory.com
to apply do not delay my friends spots
are limited again go to
decision.impacttheory.com
and apply today i'll see you guys on the
inside
how do i get to the point where i no
longer blame others and just be
accountable all the time and not just
sometimes i think the reality is you
just have to
realize that there's more advantage to
holding yourself accountable all the
time
than to
hiding from it
not living up to your own standards
it seems like the right answer to you
know let yourself off the hook or to
make promises that you're not actually
prepared to keep because it's cool or
whatever it seems to make sense in the
moment
but going back to that idea of having
credibility with yourself is one of the
most powerful emotions you will ever
feel to respect yourself
is
it's one of the the pillars of
self-worth and if you don't have
self-worth
that is a really gnarly place to be and
so
it's very okay
to only make yourself very small
promises in the beginning and then we'll
widen that out slowly over time but that
was how i earned credibility with myself
in the beginning when i didn't have any
when i would say i was going to do
things and then not do them when i would
say i'm going to get out of bed tomorrow
you know really early and then i would
lay in bed for five hours which used to
happen all the time
so i didn't start by saying oh i'm gonna
get shredded or i'm gonna build a big
business it started with i'm gonna go to
the gym
not even i'm gonna work out hard i'm
gonna go to the gym
and so then i would go to the gym if i
felt like walking out i would walk out
then as i found okay hey look at that
i'm being consistent i'm going to the
gym every time that i say i'm going to
go to the gym now
it's about okay well can i push it a
little harder than i did last time and
then you start doing that and then it's
like well can i set a goal for myself to
be able to lift a certain amount of
weight to look a certain way to lose a
certain amount of fat whatever it is you
want to do
if you start building on that making
slightly bigger demands over time you
know maybe you increment the demand
weekly and so it's like this is what i'm
going to do this week and then the next
week is a little more all of a sudden a
year later it's pretty extraordinary
you've had 52 increments of improvement
which is huge
so realizing that you get this
tremendous benefit from two things one
making what you promise yourself smaller
so that you know you can trust yourself
to do it and then two constantly like
bumping that out a little bit then you
actually get a huge reward so in in that
you have gotten better at something you
have moved towards a goal you have
actually obtained your goals that you
can set
over time you can set these bigger and
bigger more audacious goals and you can
actually reach them now when you know
that about yourself you have that
credibility with yourself
you know that you're going to stick to
it now when you set a goal it's like yo
this goal is exciting i'm amped up
because i know that i'm going to follow
through
and as long as you've built up that
muscle right the resilience
the ability to push through pain
boredom
when you have that and you've built that
resilience that tenacity
now all of a sudden you don't want to
not be accountable to yourself because
you want to feel good about yourself and
you actually want to achieve those goals
man that's like if i could snap my
fingers and give people a gift it would
be to say hey the craziest dream that
you have you can actually make that come
true
the craziest dream that you have you can
actually make come true
that's why accountability is so joyful
because now it's like whoa how i spend
my time becomes a spiritual
consideration
because i can do anything that doesn't
violate the laws of physics and that i
set my mind to and i'm willing to work
towards
now you may end up failing there may be
some things goals you said that are out
of your reach but i promise
by the time you get there
you will be so enamored
with just showing up for yourself and
leaving it all out on the field
it won't be traumatic
to fail to achieve a goal
because you'll realize that
becoming capable of a championship
performance is far more emotionally
gratifying than actually winning the
championship
it's the journey because imagine if you
cheated and won a championship
that emotion will forever be tainted it
will forever be fragile it will be all
too easy for somebody to come and just
scratch reveal that you cheated and it
all comes crumbling down all of the
emotional scaffolding that you've built
within yourself
it just comes down
but showing up for yourself time after
time playing to the best of your ability
being optimistic continuing to push that
really will be its own reward
all right is there beneficial
accountability and harmful
accountability how does an individual
differentiate between the two and use
accountability to better their life all
right so you could sort of
force this and say
anything has pathology on both sides
now i will say in general accountability
feels very good to me but
you can get
pathology on never holding yourself
accountable and then you can get
pathology by i said i was going to do
this thing by this date and even though
i finally achieved it i missed my date
and therefore none of this really
matters
so
there's no question that
beating yourself up like that
of you know let's say that you set a
goal and hey i'm going to work towards
this i'm going to accomplish it by this
date if you
lose the forest for the trees as they
say or
lose the spirit of the law to the letter
of the law like most of the goals that
i've set for myself i have achieved but
almost never by the date that i set for
myself it's just there's always some
additional complication that you don't
see something that takes longer than you
wanted and so i've got two choices i can
either beat the [ __ ] out of myself and
say hey you missed this date or i can be
proud of myself that i set a date that
was so aggressive it gave me something
to chase it got me out there got me
moving fast thinking big figuring out
how the hell am i going to pull this off
in this amount of time
but then going back to accountability
inside my own head i know whether i've
left it all out in the field now if i
know that i've left it all out on the
field i really did everything that i
could
but i've missed that date now it's
pathology if i'm just beating the [ __ ]
out of myself but i would say that
doesn't make any sense and so
looking at
being honest with yourself and this is
really what it comes down to can you be
honest with yourself about whether you
left it all out in the field and if you
did and you really are playing to the
best of your abilities but you failed in
that moment
then yes continuing to thrash yourself
because
some piece of that goal was missed
i think is unwise
so that's really honestly when i think
about accountability with the self i
think about it more did you really give
it your all were you sincere in that
pursuit and if you guys have followed my
content for a while you've heard me say
that
i right now i'm trying to build the next
disney okay
now
i hold myself accountable to showing up
every day
and sincerely trying to achieve that
goal
but i do not hold myself accountable to
whether i actually achieve that goal
because that to me is somewhat
irrelevant in the grand scheme of things
it is the pursuit of the goal that's all
the jews it's becoming the person
capable of doing that that's the juice
it's showing up every day and playing to
win it's showing up every day and
sincerely not not for rhetoric not to be
able to say to somebody that oh i'm
trying to do this but to know in my
heart of hearts that i have really done
everything that i could to make this a
reality now the reason that i divorce
myself from the ultimate outcome is
because you don't want to live for some
future time this is where people chasing
money get themselves into trouble they
think that if they amass a certain
amount of wealth that they'll feel good
about themselves but the reality is the
external goal is never going to make you
feel some kind of way about yourself
it's always super temporary you're
always if you're driven are going to be
looking at what's that next mountain to
climb anyway so if you know that then
you know it's about the climb it's not
about actually getting the thing so
avoiding that pathology becomes
critically important and this is
everything not just accountability just
understanding that there is pathology on
both sides so be very careful not to
underperform
and be careful not to think that the end
goal is the only thing that matters it's
really showing up and playing well
it's not whether you win or lose it's
how you play the game
as cheesy as that is i will say that
that is
is that absolutely true
sort of
if you don't have a love for winning
then you'll never show up and actually
play to win and so you'll never quite
have that sincere pursuit so there is a
very nuanced subtlety that i find
infinitely fascinating
because i really am trying to build the
next disney i really want that [ __ ] i am
[ __ ] focused on it i believe in it i
really obsess over it
but i also know that i can't guarantee
the outcome
and i need to enjoy today
i need to enjoy today hold yourself
accountable to that [ __ ]
all right i usually create rules and
stick with them for a while however in
days when i'm real sad tired or
pessimistic i usually use excuses to
break my rules and it is a real struggle
to get back to them after that how how
do i create accountability even in the
times when your mind is weaker all right
this is what accountability is all about
so this is about showing up for yourself
when you're tired when you're fatigued
when you're feeling pessimistic
literally accountability is there to
save you in that moment so that you know
regardless of the fact that i feel sad
tired pessimistic hopeless whatever i'm
gonna show up and play right now today
these are the moments this is where you
get to show yourself who you are now
if you let yourself down in that moment
we're going to feel that sting we're
going to take that l we're not going to
pretend that it wasn't a nil we're not
going to pretend that we didn't [ __ ] up
we're not going to pretend that we
didn't let ourselves down we did we let
ourselves down that's real
but now
we know that it doesn't make sense to
sit there wallow in that beat myself to
death
i need to focus and start moving forward
that is really the key to get yourself
back up to get back in the game and to
get moving forward so in those moments
we're gonna set that aside we do not
have
we are not willing to tolerate from
ourselves that being tired sad hurt
pessimistic whatever that's not an
excuse [ __ ] that noise why because it
doesn't move us towards our goals it's
not about the outside world i don't give
a [ __ ] what they think
i want my goal
i want to actually achieve that thing
and i actually believe that i can pull
it off so i'm showing up every day
sincerely playing for that
when i [ __ ] up i own it i take my l i
dust myself off and i get moving again
and i'm not going i'm gonna hold myself
accountable to not kicking the [ __ ] out
of myself to getting refocused and
moving forward
this is why guys beliefs rules values
they are important i have a rule in my
life
i only do and believe that which moves
me towards my goals about myself right
i'm not gonna make up fake [ __ ] about
the world
i'm not opposed to that in certain
circumstances
if it's not objective truth
i don't lie to myself about
physics there are certain things that
even if i might be wrong it's far better
to believe something that is hopeful
optimistic empowering
but anyway back to my point
i don't do or believe anything about
myself
if it moves me away from my goals
so the only things that i do and believe
propel me forward because i have that
rule
that when i go to beat the [ __ ] of
myself out of myself for a prolonged
period of time
i just don't allow it i do what's called
a pattern interrupt say don't say that
about yourself stop
don't think that don't waste any time
with that because it's not going to help
and because i'm so obsessed with what
works
it's very easy for me to
let myself off the hook
for
past failings to get back on the horse
refocus on earning that credibility with
myself holding myself accountable now to
the next movement
and don't use failure as a way to
get out of accountability i failed
therefore i am a failure right that's
known as a cognitive distortion it's
labeling failing doesn't make you a
failure
failing to
show up for yourself does not mean that
you're unaccountable
you weren't accountable in that moment
refocus get back on the horse move
forward
do you think setting unrealistic goals
or maybe too many goals make
accountability counterproductive i find
i sometimes set the bar too high and am
disappointed when the goal isn't
achieved
so yeah i think that that can be a
problem now at the same time i believe
in the quote which i'm going to
paraphrase which is the reasonable man
conforms to the world the unreasonable
man forces the world to conform to him
therefore all progress depends on the
unreasonable man so i think all of us
should be unreasonable i think that we
should set goals that are like maybe a
little too aggressive they shouldn't be
so ridiculous that you just write them
off in your own mind you know i'm never
going to get to that it's you know it's
too aggressive you don't want to do that
that's a waste of time you have to
believe that it's actually possible but
you want to set a very aggressive goal
that other people think is crazy that
it's going to force you to think outside
the box on how you can do that thing
that big that fast
trust me
but we don't start there we start with
the little things we earn that
credibility we show up we're accountable
over and over and over but we keep
pushing out how big that goal is because
we're getting stronger we're getting
better we've showed up for ourselves
we're
putting all these skills into our
arsenal so now when i say hey i'm going
to do this b hag as they call it a big
hairy audacious goal i know that i'm
going to see that thing through i know i
just need to stay excited about it i
need to stay in the game long enough i
need to have tenacity i need to have
grit in order to see this thing through
how do you eat an elephant one bite at a
time
so i'm all for setting a gigantic goal
but you have to be very careful with how
you
treat yourself
if you fail to hit part of that do you
beat yourself up and therefore just give
up on the whole thing and use those
failings as a sign that you should just
throw your hands up and quit because if
you do then that's pointless goes back
to that rule we only do and believe that
which moves us towards our goals
period
so
if you're setting goals that are so
unrealistic that you can't believe in
them and then you end up
self-flagellating
because
you think you're a loser
because you didn't do that thing then
yeah dial back the goal
get it to where you feel good like i
said my goals in the beginning were very
small
and then i just stacked and pushed and
pushed and pushed
until i got to the point where i was
like yo i know if i set the goal to
build the next disney
that i will go all out for that every
day
and again
not judge myself on whether i achieve it
but judge myself daily on how hard i
played
and that's the juice
know that you have goals that make sense
they're exciting and honorable know that
you have rules in your life that lead
you towards fulfillment and joy
so that you don't end up in some
accountability death spiral of kicking
the [ __ ] out of yourself and setting
these absurd goals that aren't even
exciting to you anymore and you're just
beating yourself up because you're not
achieving it okay that's that's not what
we're after
we want fulfillment we want joy we want
to love our lives on a day-to-day basis
in the grind
don't just
think that
i'll love my life once i have
accomplished x y and z i promise you
when you accomplish x y and z you will
just look for what's the next abc you'll
loop back around you'll be looking for
the next
big thing to chase
only the chase
matters
it's the only thing that there really
ever is right eckhart tolle's idea of
there is only the now there is only the
chase that's it everything else is
transient everything else is momentary
you could sell a company i know i've
done it and
it was rad
and for a while it really sticks with
you
and then like anything it just starts to
fade
and you're living your day-to-day life
only
the pursuit
is real
focus on that hold yourself accountable
to that
if you do that
then
then you will feel good about yourself
which ultimately is the only thing that
matters
all right guys accountability it's a
beast show for yourself show up for
other people
it is an extraordinarily good feeling
when you know that you can count on
yourself it builds incredibly strong
relationships when people know that they
can count on you
all right that's it go forth use it
wisely and until next time my friends be
legendary take care
thank you for watching this episode
which again was brought to you by impact
theory's very own business decision
making workshop if you guys are ready to
take your business to the next level by
investing in yourself and learning the
first principles of business then i want
you to take action right now and go to
decision.impacttheory.com
to apply i promise you i am giving you
every piece of information that you will
need to overcome any obstacle that your
company is facing to stare down problems
that will arrive a year five years after
you take the course this is the
strategies of business decision making
that every successful entrepreneur has
to learn to deploy against their company
if they want to grow all right guys i
promise it will deliver
10x the value of what you pay for it and
if it doesn't i'll give you your money
back no questions asked you know me i
live in the public eye there's nowhere
for me to hide this is me trying to give
as much value as humanly possible i
really think this class will be
transformative and i hope you will sign
up and i will see you in the next live
class all right guys take care and be
legendary
you